IT BEGINS...

We will miss you Ron Prince

You are laughable.

A New Era

Three more days....

until the disgraces that are Kevin Cosgrove and Bill Callahan are removed from positions that they never deserved to be in.

The Weekend to End All Weekends

The following is a minute-by-minute, blow-by-blow account of one weekend that won't soon be forgotten.

Friday, November 2nd

4:36pm (Arden Hills, MN) - Chad leaves work. Visions of a long, fun weekend envelope his mind. Timberwolves game, road trip, Husker game...all of it certain to contribute to a grand weekend. What could possibly go wrong?!?

7:08pm (Minneapolis, MN) - Chad arrives at the Target Center with his Dad and discovers that the tickets which were left for them, are 3rd row tickets, courtside. Chad and Dad have a blast watching the T-Wolves flirt with an upset of the Denver Nuggets.

8:49pm (Minneapolis, MN) - After badly missing a shot right in front of them, Chad tells Allen Iverson that he should go to practice. AI turns his head to see who had the gall to say such a thing, but the origin of the heckler is not identified by the All-Star.

9:50pm (Minneapolis, MN) - Carmelo Anthony and the veteran experience of Denver leads to a 4th quarter pull away victory. Despite the setback, Chad continues on with his weekend, climbs into his pristine 2003 Jeep Liberty and heads out of town.

11:28pm (Mason City, IA) - The drive down I-35 is a boring one. Chad listens to DMB whilst day-dreaming of how sweet it will be to crush the dreams of Jayhawk nation when Nebraska beats Kansas, despite the fact that KU is inexplicably 19 point favorites. Chad concludes that KU is overrated and is reassured by KU's last 2 games, unimpressive victories over Colorado and Texas A&M. Barely noticed, Chad sees 2 deer on the side of the interstate and decides to concentrate a little harder on the road.

Saturday, November 3rd

1:15am (Des Moines, IA) - Having decided earlier to drive to Omaha and join friends who will bus to Lawrence, KS in the morning (as opposed to driving all the way to Lawrence by himself), Chad stops for gas, and takes the Council Bluffs exit, now heading due west on I-80.

2:29am (Somewhere in Iowa) - The life of a deer apparently isn't all it's cracked up to be. One deer decides to end it right here and now. Said deer jumps in front of Chad's vehicle. Doe's timing is impeccable. Chad has no time to react and collides with Doe head on.

2:30am (I-80 Mile Marker 81.20) - The collision impact causes the hood of Chad's car to flop open, blinding Chad completely. He is momentarily disoriented and his Jeep swerves all over the road. Thankfully no other vehicle is close by and a major car accident is avoided. Chad regains his senses, slows the vehicle down and pulls over into the median.

3:07am - (I-80 Mile Marker 81.20) - The damage to the front of Chad's vehicle is extensive and Chad decides that it shouldn't be driven. He has called 911 and one of Iowa's finest has been dispatched. A good samaritan from Omaha named Joel stops to make sure everything is okay, (the only person to stop while Chad was on the side of the interstate for better than 75 minutes). They talk Husker football for a few minutes before Chad assures Joel that the HYPO should get there any minute and he is fine waiting by himself, (just in case Joel is a seriel killer).

3:45am (Adair, IA) - The Iowa HYPO has finally arrived and taken an incident report. He confirms Chad's suspicions that Doe is in several pieces and did not suffer. A silent tear runs down Chad's face as he wonders what could've driven this Doe to the breaking point. Craig Wedemeyer of Craig's Towing Service, Adair, IA, has towed Chad and his Jeep Liberty to his shop. At this point Chad is convinced that his grand weekend adventure is over, until Craig becomes the hero of the day by offering Chad a ride to Omaha.

5:08am (Omaha, NE) - Chad arrives at the apartment of Jon and Bob, thanks Craig one last time and regales the fellas with his story. Before they meet up with the others, $26 worth of breakfast food is purchased at McDonalds.

6:15am (Omaha, NE) - The group boards a bus with 30 other festive Husker fans, young and old. Chad starts to get annoyed with the attention he's receiving. The first alcoholic beverage is opened and consumed before the bus even leaves the Omaha city limits. Chad is going to attempt to sleep for awhile before he gets his drink on.

10:37am (Lawrence, KS) - A rowdy and celebratory atmosphere on the bus has led to two things, no sleep for Chad, and plenty of before-noon beer drinking. The No Option Tailgate traveling party has realized that there will be little time for tailgating (game starts at 11:30am) and begin tailgating inside the bus on I-70. Beer relays and a team pitcher chug are played with gusto.

11:35am (Lawrence, KS) - The game starts. The Blackshirt defense forces a 3 and out on the first position and the Husker offense, lead by new QB starter Joe Ganz, drives down the field and scores. NU 7 KU 0. The defense reverts back to its usual self and gives up TD, but a 62-yard TD by Marlon Lucky puts the 'Skers back up. Optimism is sky high. NU 14 KU 7.

3:07pm (Lawrence, KS) - The majority of the No Option Tailgate left the stadium before the game ends, after watching with mouths agape at an atrocity. KU has scored in 10 straight possesions while taking an embarassingly one-sided 76-39 victory. Aside from the blowout, KU fans sitting near our group had made the day unbearable. One such Jayhawk fan wearing a visor was spouting racial epitaphs against Mexicans. Our Mexian-American friend Jose (along with the rest of the group) was none to pleased, but the reaction of his new bride Jamie would've made General Patton blush. She lit into him and had to be restrained. We promptly called security over and had the visor-wearing racist removed.

4:36pm (Lawrence, KS) - The suffering is over and the group is back on the bus getting the f*ck out of dodge. There is unanimous concensus that Callahan and Coz must go as their reign over Nebraska football has led to even more undesirable records, now including most points given up in a 1st half (48) and most points given up in a game (76).

5:58pm (St. Joseph, MO) - A McDonald's off I-35 is ravaged by the No Option Tailgate travel party. Over 100 chicken nuggets are purchased. The mood on the bus is subdued. Some nap, others continue debating the finer points of how/when Dr. Tom makes the move that is now enivitable. Beers continue to be consumed but without the revelry of drinking games. The 2005 Alamo Bowl is put into the DVD player. The group's collective mood is improved by watching Nebraska actually play well and beat a ranked opponent, although boo's rain down each time Mike Tirico and Kirk Herbstreit praise the Husker coaching staff.

8:49pm (Omaha, NE) - After what seemed a longer trip coming back, the bus arrives in Omaha and travel party members go their own way. The mood is a tired one and no one really feels like going out. So it's back to Jon and Bob's for a quiet evening.Sunday, November 4th1:13am (Omaha, NE) - The "quiet" evening has turned into a Nintendo Wii/Rum and Coke party. Chad decides to pass on the 50/50 Rum and Cokes which Jon is downing like a champ. When Bob suggests playing Wii, Chad is skeptical.

2:30am (Omaha, NE) - "Ninento Wii is the greatest thing ever!" Chad proclaims. The Tennis, Bowling and Golf games are so much fun it should be outlawed. Chad's probably drunk. Chad hits a proverbial wall. After 44 consecutive hours awake, Chad goes to sleep.

9:00am (Omaha, NE) - Thinking he had been asleep only 5 minutes, Jon wakes Chad up and takes him to the airport, despite the fact that he probably would fail a breathilizer. Chad orginially planned on renting a car and driving back to Minnesota while his car gets repaired at a Jeep dealership in Des Moines. However, the prospect of a brutal drive home is enough to change his plans.

2:15pm (Minneapolis, MN) - Chad's United Airlines flight arrives in Minneapolis. Chad mentally agrees that the extra cost was well worth it. The trip and the weekend to end all weekends are over.